Summer love

I haven't forgotten about this blog, not at all. It may seem as if I have but the true problem lies within the lack of inspiration and motivation. This is something all of us encounter probably, at certain times, at certain places. My source of inspiration generally comes from other blogs (like I mentioned in my first post), lyrics and most of all, long walks in the city or around my house which trigger my thoughts to be more than just about my daily life, what I'll eat for dinner later, the amount of homework I have, worrying. My thoughts become a lot more profound when I'm inspired. I start to think further than all that. I think of my future, what I'll look like when i'm forty-six, how many kids I'll give birth to, where I'm gonna live, whom I'm going to marry, will I ever be successful, what if I wont, what if., what if.. So yes, my thoughts are mainly based on the what if's and who's and where's. It is quite worrying to be honest, and often, thoughts as such upset us or worry us. And that is what we call overthinking, my friends. My point being, inspiration is necessary for everyone however, our methods of seeking it may often lead us to the wrong paths or lead us to thinking about thoughts we shouldn't really think about. I'm getting quite off-track with the general topic of my blog which is 'memories', but I figured I owe these few blog readers of mine an explanation of why I haven't been blogging lately!

Speaking of inspiration more specifically, I'd like to point out and relive a certain period of time which became one of the best phases of my life, so far. I always promised myself I wouldn't talk about boys publicly unless they have somewhat of a sentimental meaning to me. So yeah, surprise surprise, here goes nothing: That summer was probably the most memorable summer of all, excluding my childhood summers which are unforgettable in all ways. For the past couple years, I've always gone to Estonia the 22nd of June. This is because the school I go to in Madrid always ends very late in June, it's quite irritating but that's that. Honestly, I'm not too fond of leaving Madrid anymore, because I consider it my home now, but in the previous years, there was always something pulling me to Estonia - my friends. That summer was quite the same, I wanted to be in Estonia to be with my friends and my mom.

On the 3rd of July, I was exploring the nightlife of a small but unbelievably pleasant town in Estonia with some of my friends. It was cold, I mean what do you expect at 2 AM on a summer eve, and frankly I was bored. Being the only girl along with four guys gets quite boring. I figured, what the hell, I'll check my Whatsapp and see who there is to talk to. I, for some idiotic reason, decided to ask one of my friend's friend whether he is at a local skatepark currently, as I was there. I figured, you know, since I'm the only girl, why not meet up and simply have a chat. Instead of just chatting, it became Whatsapp conversations, one after another, day by day, week by week. It was pleasant, and I was senseless enough to somewhat catch feelings for this person. Warning: This is not a good idea when you're fully aware that you're leaving Estonia in a short while for ten months after summer, and you won't be seeing this person for a long while.

The 7th of July, that's my birthday, I got the funniest and most original picture of a 'birthday cake' from this person. It was a picture of a plate filled with apples and candy, basically, but I laughed so much. That was practically the first day we started talking legitimately despite the fact we only talked through Whatsapp for the time being. He would send me the craziest and funniest photos, videos and voiceclips which I listen to occasionally. All of the days and nights that we saw eachother were worth remembering, especially since we spent them along with his friends who are the coolest people ever, hands down. Since I stayed at my aunts house, I'd politely have to ask whether it's okay to go to town to see this boy. The most embarrassing part was the fact that I'd get home at around 2 AM each time, and I'd always take the cab home.

This one day, and probably my favorite day of all, we walked all the way to the top of this huge hill and just sat there for an hour or so. We just talked really, but it made me content. In cases like these, little things are what make a good relationship. Most of all, the sunset, the nice views and the presence of him was a nice combo. Jeez, I don't like being this mushy but how else do I talk about these things?

 The main moral I could possibly think of is don't take the risk of a long-distance relationship when your relationship is young and fresh. It's not worth it and it generally ruins the relationship as opposed to developing it. Furthermore, I came to realize that when you least expect something, it comes to you. Don't go around looking for your future husband or whatever significant person, you'll either be disappointed or your already high hopes will most likely come crashing down. These types of memories are unique and sometimes you won't even experience likely memories in your life, which is why we've got to reminisce once in a while to recall the good times.

The time spent together was and still is incredible to think about. It's fascinating how two people can become so close in such a short time, so close that when you think of the future, you vision yourself with that certain person. It's also quite incredible how fast these types of feelings can vanish.


Stay fresh,

Helen